Parenting with Joy in Challenging Times: How to Fill Your Own Cup and Be Present for Your Kids
I sat down to write the September blog post on a totally different topic but realized this was the only thing that wanted to come out today.
I wanted to make some space for the collective fear and grief so many of us are experiencing right now as parents - in so many ways, but particularly in regards to the most recent school shooting news. This one hit extra close to home for me and many in our HWG community as it was just miles from Atlanta, and there’ve been many other threats since at nearby schools.
Parenting is a beautiful journey filled with so many joyful moments, but it can also be challenging, especially in times when the world feels so heavy and overwhelming. How do we do it? How do we carry this weight and still show up every day for our kids - for their needs and their own fears? How do you fill your own cup so that you can be fully present for your child and lean in with connection when you're feeling emotionally depleted? For me, the answer is about taking care of ourselves first and finding ways to fill our own cups.
Acknowledge the Weight
It’s important to recognize and honor the weight you may be feeling. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed, and it’s normal to carry the burden of the world’s troubles. Acknowledging these feelings is the first step in addressing them. It’s not about ignoring the challenges but rather about finding a balance that allows you to navigate them without letting them overshadow your time with your children.
Prioritize Self-Care
One of the most effective ways to manage these feelings is through self-care. When you’re running on empty, it’s extra hard to show up for your kids with joy and presence.
Schedule Time for Yourself: Set aside time each day or week to do something that rejuvenates you. It could be as simple as a quiet cup of coffee, a walk, or reading a book. Remember, self-care isn’t selfish—it’s necessary for your well-being and for you to be the parent you want to be. (See our earlier blog post on Self Care)
Connect with Friends, Family, and Community: Sharing your feelings with others who understand can provide comfort and perspective. It’s also helpful to hear how others are managing similar challenges.
Practice Mindfulness: Deep breathing, meditation or mindfulness can help center your thoughts and reduce stress. These practices can be integrated into your daily routine and can be beneficial in staying regulated. Engage in activities that bring you joy and make you feel alive! This can recharge your emotional battery and improve your overall outlook.
Model Resilience and Positivity
These kids of ours are incredibly perceptive and often pick up on their parents’ emotional states. By managing our own stress, we have the opportunity to set a powerful example for them.
Embrace and Share Your Feelings: It’s okay to let your kids know that sometimes you’re feeling sad or worried, but also show them how you cope and find moments of happiness. This teaches them that it’s okay to feel a range of emotions and provides them with tools to handle their own feelings.
Create Joyful Moments: Find small ways to bring joy into your daily routine. It could be dancing in the living room, having a picnic indoors or starting a new family tradition. These moments help create a positive environment and build happy memories.
Foster a Sense of Hope: Focus on the positive aspects of life and highlight the good things happening around you. By nurturing a sense of hope and optimism, you help your children develop a similar outlook.
Build a Supportive Environment
A supportive environment can make a world of difference. Surround yourself with people and resources that uplift and support you. This might include:
Professional Support: If you’re struggling, don’t hesitate to seek help from a therapist or counselor. Professional guidance can provide you with strategies to manage stress and maintain a positive mindset.
Community Connections: Engage with community resources or parenting groups that offer support and understanding. Connecting with others in similar situations can provide reassurance, practical advice and comfort.
Parenting in these times is not easy, but by prioritizing self-care, modeling resilience, and building a supportive environment, you can navigate these difficulties while still showing up with joy and presence for your children. Remember, taking care of yourself isn’t just about making your life easier—it’s about ensuring that you can be the best parent you can be. By filling your own cup, you’re not only enriching your own life but also creating a positive, loving environment for your little ones. Embrace the journey with all its ups and downs, and know that you have the strength and resources to shine brightly for your family.
*Sometimes, when we feel powerless, it helps to take action. If you’re looking for something you can do to be part of a change, check out https://momsdemandaction.org/act/